New Joke Thread

[YniYni]

I saw that we had another joke thread but it was one post and 6 months old so I just made a new one. This is for jokes and riddle like things that are more funny then serious.


What happens when a T-Rex bites you?
You get a dino-sore.

What do you call a 30 foot purple dinosaur named Fred who has acne and is scared of penguins?
Fred.

What lottery did the broom win?
The sweepstakes.

What do outlaws eat with their milk?
Crookies.

Wanna hear a dirty joke?
Ok.
The boy fell in the mud. Ready for a clean joke?
Yeah.
He took a bath.

Who ruled France until he exploded?
Napoleon Blownapart!

What happens if a pig parks illegally?
It oink-urs a fine.

What do you call a cracked window?
A pane in the glass.

[thebunni15]

Well I'll make sure this one doesn't get stale.


Once there were three guys, their names were Shut Up, Manners, and Poop. They were driving on the road until Poop fell out. Shut Up went to a gas station with police there. "What's your name?" said the police officer. "Shut Up." replied Shut Up. "Hey, where's your manners?" cried the officer. "Outside on the road picking up Poop."

And that was an old one I had in heart.
Der End.

[Riida]

Nice jokes guys xD
Two men walked into a bar. The third one ducked.

[thebunni15]

Bumpity bump Bump-So this thread doesn't die.

What do you call an occasion of grilling dolls?

A Barbie-que!
Hehehe...ah, not funny?

[Riida]

"One time a blind man stepped into Chuck Norris. He says, "Watch where you're going!". The blind man replies "Sorry sir, I'm blind." Chuck Norris touched his eyes, and cured the man of his blindness. Unfortunately, the first, last, and the only thing he ever saw was a roundhouse kick to the face."

[Madi2]

Bumpity bump Bump-So this thread doesn't die.

What do you call an occasion of grilling dolls?

A Barbie-que!
Hehehe...ah, not funny?

You're making me hungry!
Nice joke though.

[cas91011]

You wanna Hear a dirty Joke?
Billy Played in mud.
You wanna Hear a clean Joke?
Billy took a bath with bubbles
You wanna hear a nasty Joke?
Bubbles is the girl next Door.


~LoL 4evz Cas91011 :blueangel:

[screwbaII]

Those kinds of jokes Charlie, although you mean no offense, are probably not appropriate for this forum.

[Madi2]

Which joke?

[screwbaII]

I deleted it

[Madi2]

Was it disturbing? -_-

[screwbaII]

Kind of... yea... well I find those kinds of jokes gross and bordering sick...

[Madi2]

Explains why you deleted it.

[EvilMuffinz]

Bumpity bump Bump-So this thread doesn't die.

What do you call an occasion of grilling dolls?

A Barbie-que!
Hehehe...ah, not funny?


Haha, that was funny x) Nice joke:D

[Sbacity_Boy]

Her is a blond joke I really like! (No offense to blondes!)
A blond walks in to a store and tells he manager "I would like to buy that TV."
The manager replied "I am sorry I don't sell TVs to blonds."

The blond walks out, goes and colors her hair red, walks back into the store, and tells the manager. "I would like to buy that TV"
The Manager replies "I am sorry we don't sell TVs to blonds."

The blond does the same thing except this time she colors her hair brown. She walks back into the store and tells the manager "I would like to buy that TV."
The manager replies "I am sorry we don't sell TV to blonds."

The blond yells back "How do you know I am a blond! I went out and colored my hair twice and still you knew I was a blond!"
The manager explains back to her/him "Miss/Sir..... Miss/Sir that isn't a TV... that's a microwave."

[Thisismyusername]

wow......I heard that alot...
Teacher: George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted doing it. Now do you know why his father didn't punish him?

Student: Because George still had the ax in his hand.

[Sbacity_Boy]

Wow..... I heard THAT a lot....
Teacher: "Alice, will you please compose a sentence starting with the word 'I'."
Alice: "Ok.....Ummm...... I is-"
Teacher: "No, when you start a sentence with 'I' you always say 'I am' or 'I'm'. Now start again."
Alice: "Ok...... I am the ninth letter in the alphabet."

[EvilMuffinz]

I don't get it...o: xD

[Sbacity_Boy]

She was going to say " 'I' is the ninth letter of the alphabet." but the teacher "corrected her and made her say " 'I' am the ninth letter of the alphabet."

[EvilMuffinz]

Ohh....ahah(x Silly meh

[elpuntthing]

A boy says to his teacher: "please may I go to the toilet?"
She says: "Only if you say the alphabet."
So he says: "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOQRSTUVWXYZ."
The teacher says: "Where's the P?"
The boy replies: "Running down my leg."

Yes its old but it was the only one I could think of.

[PrayerWarriorAsh]

Teacher: We can all learn a good lesson from George Washington. Even though he was naughty and cut down the cherry tree, he did not lie to his father about it. Why do you think he told the truth?
Student: George still had the ax in his hand.

[Suki]

There was a robery in this town one day. The robber had a gun, he yelled, "Everyone hand over your wallets!" They did as he said. When he went to his secret hideout to check how much money he stole. He ended up with nothing. Because the people took out the money, and just gave him the wallet.
Solution for next time: Be more specific

[Sbacity_Boy]

Scary, Random Orange: Knock knock.
Fred: Who's there?
Scary, Random Orange: Orange.
Fred: Orange who?
S,R Orange: Orange.
Fred: ORANGE WHO!!!
S,R Orange: Orange.
Fred: JUST TELL ME WHO IS THERE!
S,R Orange: Orange.
Fred: OH MY GOSH!! JUST TELL ME WHO IS THERE.
S,R Orange: Orange you glad I didn't say orange again?
Fred: Hey. That's funny. Yeah. Wow, that was weird.

[Vummissedia]

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